Guilt has set in

Pregnancy is not what I expected. At all. I guess I had it in my mind that I would be excited all the time and busy in preparation for our new arrival. Not quite the case. I am so tired that I can barely squeeze out enough energy after work to make myself a bowl of cereal. I'm so worried that my unusual symptoms might indicate that something is wrong. And when those symptoms don't surface for a few hours or a day, I worry that something is wrong. I feel guilty. I have wanted this for so long and it's not what I expected: to enjoy being pregnant, with all it has to offer.

On another note, I have my 8 week ultrasound scheduled for today. I'm very excited to see the progress of our little bean, yet with each ultrasound, I always have this dread in the back of my mind that it could all be over in the blink of an eye. Whatever the case, the Lord will provide.